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I’ve never really been included. I’ve never felt like I truly belonged. But then again, how could I? Living on this island, I’ve seen and heard too many things. Lies. Secrets. Lies I’ve been forced to tell and secrets I’ve been forced to keep. They keep me locked to myself. They’re the reason I stand on the edge of the horizon and watch from afar. Other people’s lives have evolved, but not mine. It’s exactly the same. Day after day, the sun rises, and every time its rays penetrate my skin, I’m reminded that no matter how desperately I don’t want to be, I’m trapped. I want to live. I want to breathe. I just want to be . . . free.
If I had my way, I would have walked off the catwalk and straight out of the public eye years ago. Never-ending contracts and obligations have kept me prisoner until recently. Now it is fear that has me trapped and running from my life. I’m now hiding in a tiny beach cottage in my mother’s hometown, praying no one will find me. No one understands. The demands, lack of control, threats ... I just want it all gone. I want to escape. When do I finally get to be me? Free.